Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Introduction to "Boundaries With Kids"

As I shared with you at our first study, my reason for choosing this book is deeply personal.  As an adult I've realized that many of my issues stem from my childhood.  Through counseling, prayer and reading the Bible I've come to understand how to deal with these issues as well as avoid them in the futre.  Reading the book "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend literally changed my life and how I deal with people and my relationships. However, what I realized is that I was missing a key component:  how do I BREAK the cycle so that my kids aren't in counseling twenty years from now because of what I did wrong? 

As parents we often feel lost without a map.  The Bible should be our guide to everything in life but we don't always know how to apply the principles specifically to parenting today.  How many times do we wish someone would just TELL us what to do?  While "Boundaries With Kids" isn't a magical answer, it is a great resource to use WITH our Bible and is based on Biblical principles.  Someone just did the work for us!

Some key things mentioned in the introduction are great at summing up what this book is all about.
  • This book is not "problem centered" but "principle centered." (p9)
  • This book is geared much more toward how you, the parent will behave with your child than toward you educating your child. (p10)
  • Learning boundaries has a lot to do with going through experiences such as receiving consequences for behavior, learning to take ownership, and dealing with the boundaries of others. (p10)
  • "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.  Later on, however, it produces are harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."  Hebrews 12:11
  • The boundary building process begins with you!

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