Making Good the Law of Sowing and Reaping
The list of reality consequences is endless. The only limit is your own creativity.
DIRECTIONS: Consider again the following principles for determining reality consequences. Working alone or with your spouse, complete the following exercise.
Making the consequences a natural outflow of the crime.
In what recent or recurring parenting situation will you incorporate natural consequences to teach teh Law of Sowing and Reaping? Be specific about the consequences and how you will present them. Who will support you as you stand behind the consequences you establish?
Save consequences for serious offenses where the behavior may become a bad character pattern.
What serious offenses may be on their way to becoming a bad character pattern and therefore qualify for consequences to your home?
Give immediate consequences.
Why is immediacy important - and what keeps you from responding immediately? What will you do to remove that barrier so you're ready next time?
Stay away from emotional consequences and effect reality consequences.
What benefits - long-term as well as short-term - come with reality consequences?
Use relational consequences only if they concern your own feelings.
In what kind of situation in your home would relational consequences be logical or neutral? Be specific.
Think of consequences as protecting yourself as well as the rest of the family from the behavior of the child.
In what current or ongoing parenting situation would letting consequences happen benefit your family as well as help the guilty party learn the Law of Sowing and Reaping?
Preserve choice as much as possible.
What is preserving choice so important? Why is it difficult to do so?
Make sure there is not a good reason your child is misbehaving before invoking consequences.
What are some "good reasons" for misbehavior that parents should be alert to?
Talk to the child about the misbehavior when the child is not misbehaving.
When have you learned something important by talking to your child about her misbehavior when she is not misbehaving? Why do you tend to talk more in the heat of the moment than when it might be helpful?