Updates

We are off this Wednesday and will resume on May 9th with Study 7. We are nearing the end of our current study. Typically we take the summer off from the study. We could either do a monthly outing throughout the summer OR take the summer off completely. Please let me know your preference!

I have been thinking and praying a lot about our group and what we will do over the summer and in the fall. I am inspired by the womens ministry and how they have a team that works together. If you are interested in helping out with Little Lambs, please let me know! Everyone has different gifts to contribute. This can be anything from planning outings, writing for the blog, helping with planning the studies, being in charge of the snacks etc. Please think and pray about whether you would like to help. "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone. Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Women's study will start up again this week. The study is offered on two days, times and locations:
Wednesday evenings at 6:45 PM at Mesa View Middle School (where we meet on Sunday mornings) in the Youth Room or Thursday mornings at 10:00 AM at LifeSpring Church, 240 Maple Ave., Beaumont. Free childcare for pre-school age children (0-5 years) is offered at both studies.

Study 5 Kid Kare "Your Kids Motives"

1.  Where is your child on the spectrum of obeying to avoid punishment and obeying because it's the right thing to do?  Let "1" be behavior dictated by the outside, external restraints, and you the parent and "10" be owning behavior and doing the right things for the right reasons.

2.  Detachment is one of the enemies of the kid of contact that enables your child to grow.  Consider how detached a parent you are.  Do you express your feelings of love for your child?  Do you let yourself get close?  If you answer no to these questions, where will you go to find supportive relationships in which you can learn to be vulnerable and accessible- and when will you go?

3.  Conditional love is another enemy of the kid of parent-child contact that enables a child to grow.  Are you connecting to your child only when he is doing?  Are you withdrawing when his behavior is bad?  If your answer is yes, what will you do to break this pattern?

4.  As a parent, you can express your awareness of the pain of consequences for your own irresponsibility, model right behavior, and acknowledge what pain your actions may cause for your friends and God. Even as all that is happening, create many experiences for your children to internalize these realities and own them for themselves.  What opportunity for that internalization can you anticipate having this week? Be ready!

Study 4 Kid Care, Power Over Myself

Stop Denying Dependency
1.  What are you doing to discourage functional dependency?  What consequences are you allowing your child to deal with so that he learns the importance of taking responsibility for himself?  Who is supporting you as you enforce these consequences?
2.What are you doing to encourage relational dependency?  Start by noting which of the following are already a part of your parenting reportoire. 

• Confronting isolation
• Waiting until you are invited to help
• Encouraging him to express his wants, needs and opinions
• Recognizing and respecting his own rhythm of when he needs to be close and when he needs distance from you
• Not being intrusive and affectionate when he clearly needs to be more seperate
• Not abandoning him when he needs more intimacy

Stop Demanding Power Over All Choices
1. Has your child overcommitted himself, trying to put too many activities in too little time?  What evidence of this do you see?
2.  What system have you or could you set up that will break down if she does too much?  Consider factoring in such age appropriate requirements as an acceptable grade point average in school, four nights at home with the family each week, an established bedtime, and no signs of fatigue or stress.

Stop Avoiding Consequences
1.  When have you recently seen evidence of your little angels criminal mind at work?  How did you respond?
2.  What are the consequences for dishonesty?  What do you do to reward honesty and to encourage dishonesty in your home?